Nurturing Competent Eaters: Creating a Positive Food Environment for Children

Creating a positive food environment for your child is essential for fostering lifelong well-being. This allows your child to develop a positive relationship with food and their body, a concept often referred to as eating competence.

A competent eater is someone who:

• Approaches food with a positive attitude
• Understands and responds to their body’s hunger and fullness cues
• Is open to eating a wide variety of foods
• Approaches meals with curiosity rather than anxiety
• Eats based on internal cues
• Trusts their bodies to guide their food choice

Competent eaters also maintain flexibility in their food selections, balancing nourishment and enjoyment without rigid rules or guilt.   

Here are some key strategies caregivers can help children achieve eating competence:

1. Create an environment for your child to recognize, respond to, and trust their hunger and fullness cues with the following tips:

• Avoid pressuring children to finish their food or eat beyond fullness, as it can disrupt their natural regulation.
• Avoid creating a hierarchy of foods such as making treats more desirable.
• Avoid using phrases such as “Finish your vegetables, then you can have dessert”.
• Create a calm, distraction-free mealtime environment to help children tune into their body’s signals and eat mindfully.
• Follow the Ellyn Satter Division of Responsibility (sDOR) framework.  This is a method of feeding aimed at helping children learn to trust their own hunger and fullness cues by emphasizing these ideas:
  • Caregivers decide what, when, and where food is served.
  • Children decide if and how much to eat.

When adults try to control portions or encourage eating beyond fullness, children may begin to ignore their fullness cues to gain access to certain foods. Instead, fostering trust in a child’s ability to regulate their intake helps them develop a more balanced approach to eating.  Remember, both caregivers and children have key responsibilities when it comes to mealtime.

2. Be Mindful of Your Language and Rewards with Regards to Food

The way we talk about food plays a powerful role in shaping how children perceive it.

• Avoid labeling foods as “good” or “bad”. This creates positive and negative associations with eating certain foods.  Over time, this can set the foundation for feelings of guilt or shame when eating “bad” or “unhealthy” foods, or alternatively, feelings of happiness and positive self-worth when eating “good” foods, reinforcing a sense of identity tied to food choices.
• Avoid using food as a reward. This can further complicate a child’s relationship with eating by linking food to emotions rather than hunger. When “treats” are given for good behavior or as a consolation for distress, children may begin to associate certain foods with comfort, celebration, or approval. This can lead to emotional eating patterns, where food becomes a coping mechanism rather than a source of nourishment. 
• Adopt a neutral approach to all foods. It’s important to remember that all foods—yes, all foods—provide the body with some form of nutrients, though some are more nutrient-dense than others. By adopting a neutral approach, where all foods have a place in a balanced diet, we help children develop a healthier, more flexible relationship with eating.

The goal is to nurture your child’s natural curiosity about food rather than creating pressure or a sense of obligation. When guilt and judgment are removed from the equation, mealtimes become more enjoyable, and children can focus on listening to their bodies, exploring a variety of foods, and building lifelong healthy habits.

3. Shift Your Focus to Making Mealtime Enjoyable

Mealtime should be a relaxed and engaging experience that fosters both socialization and communication. Encouraging conversation at the table helps children build connections and enhances their overall dining experience.

• Spark meaningful discussions with simple prompts like, “What was the best part of your day?” to create a positive atmosphere that supports a lifelong appreciation for food and the social aspects of eating.
• Remove the pressure from meals and instead nurture your child’s natural curiosity through food exploration and play, making mealtimes more enjoyable.
• Encourage them to engage their senses—touching, smelling, and interacting with their food—helps build comfort with new flavors and textures, especially for selective eaters. 
• Mindful eating practices, such as chewing slowly and noticing different tastes, can further enhance their awareness of the eating experience.
• For those who eat quickly, slowing down can help them better recognize fullness cues and develop a healthier relationship with food.

By fostering a positive food environment, we empower children to become competent eaters who trust their hunger and fullness cues, enjoy a variety of foods, and develop a positive relationship with eating. Trusting their internal regulation, using neutral language, creating enjoyable mealtimes, and encouraging food exploration all contribute to a foundation of mindful and intuitive eating. When children feel supported and free from food-related pressure, they are more likely to develop habits that promote lifelong well-being.

If you would like to learn more effective strategies to foster a positive food environment for your family, book an appointment with one of our Registered Dieticians today.